


It Isn’t Worth It

by SpencerAndTaraShouldBeBFFs



Category: Criminal Minds, Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Character Study, Dilaudid, Drugs, Oneshot, Opiod Addiction, Sad Spencer Reid, don’t know how to tag, first fanfic, i think, short oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:41:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25454080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpencerAndTaraShouldBeBFFs/pseuds/SpencerAndTaraShouldBeBFFs
Summary: The first time you’ll use willingly is when you’re in the hospital detoxing. You know they know. They turn a blind eye.You say it’s the last time.It’s not.
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	It Isn’t Worth It

The first time you’ll use willingly is when you’re in the hospital detoxing. You know they know. They turn a blind eye.

You say it’s the last time.

It’s not.

-Months Later-

It now takes You about 22 minutes and 54 seconds to shoot up.

It’ll take you 4 minutes to find a room that you can hide in. You choose a bathroom stall.

Two minutes to prep the skin and needle. It doesn’t take as long as it used to.

One minute to tie the tourniquet around your arm. You tie it extra tight.

Another minute to position the needle. It feels cold against your skin.

20 seconds to question why you are doing this. You don’t know.

15 wondering how many people overdose on opioids each day in America. The answer is 128.

10 to ask if this is how you wanna spend your life. You know the answer is no.

6 to sink the needle through. You feel like a horrible person

2 to hesitate. You question what your team would think.

1 to push the plunger. I’m sorry

You’ll wait 15 minutes for the drug to hit you. 

When you feel it’s effects, You’ll lean back against the wall and enjoy the rush of euphoria. You’ll feel drowsy, as if you were just about to go to bed. It’ll be the middle of your lunch break. 

The pain you were feeling will be gone. You know it won’t last, that this is only a temporary fix, yet you let yourself get lost in this sweet feeling of relief. You have 40 minutes left in your lunch break. 

It’ll take about an hour and 30 minutes before you’ll stop feeling the drug. You know that you will be high during work. 

You know the team knows you’re using. You feel angry. At You or them? You don’t know.

You know when high ends you’ll feel a headache building behind your eyes. You’ll be irritable.

The rush isn’t worth the pain and shame you know you’ll feel when it’s over.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is my first fic. Its inspired by word_clay’s fic called cosmo’s, I suggest Reading it if you like sad Spencer Reid fic’s


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